Great moments in writing (but not mine)
Despite the fact that I'm a professional writer (at least I was when I left the office Friday afternoon, there's always the chance Chief Bossman could wake up in the I-Need-to-Fire-Someone-Today mood during the weekend and ask me to turn in my key (more on that below), I don't read a lot of books. It's not that I don't want to, but it's more of the fact that I let things like my Playstation2, sports and television get in the way. Oh, and Yes Dear likes it when I spend time with her too.
Even though I'm not an avid reader in the traditional sense, I do spend quite a bit of time reading various columnists online. Granted, I'm not reading some obscure, underground author that has caused me to change my outlook on the world, but generally it's more the sports columnists as well as a few actual "news" columnists so I can sound like I know what I'm talking about.
As an aspiring (albeit, not very good) humor writer, I find myself reading humor columns and thinking to myself, "That's pure gold." Now I don't laugh out loud often when reading things, especially online (and especially when I'm at the office "working.") But today, I couldn't help myself.
Bill Simmons (ESPN's Sports Guy) was writing about the introductions to Monday Night Football and how he wished that type of introduction could be used in everyday life. (For those who don't know, the starters all have the opportunity to say their name and college when the offense or defense is introduced.) Simmons wrote that he wished that could be done instead of some cheesy DJ at weddings. It would go something to the effect of "Bill 'Big Game' Simmons, Usher, College of Holy Cross or "'Dirty' Luke Martin, Groomsman, The Georgia Southern University."
I asked Yes Dear if we weren't married, if she would have considered doing it. She looked at me as if I'd just asked if she minded if I took a call from Angelina Jolie in the other room. Since most of my friends are already married, I guess I have to pin my hopes on Official Brother.
In unrelated news, my key doesn't fit the lock at my work anymore. For the better part of three years, when people have asked me how work was going, I would inevitably say "well, my key still fits the lock, so I guess that means I'm still employed." However, when I left to go home for dinner Wednesday night, I noticed my key wasn't working correctly. When I got back, the door was locked and, sure enough, I wasn't getting in on my own. Fortunatley there were people there to let me in, but my irrational fears of getting fired have been with me ever since. (Maybe I can take the approach of one of George's girlfriends from Seinfeld and simply refuse to accept the firing. If I keep showing up, what are they going to do?)
What I'm playing: EA sports FIFA 2005
What I'm watching: NFL Playoffs
On Deck: The origins of the nickname "Dirty"
Even though I'm not an avid reader in the traditional sense, I do spend quite a bit of time reading various columnists online. Granted, I'm not reading some obscure, underground author that has caused me to change my outlook on the world, but generally it's more the sports columnists as well as a few actual "news" columnists so I can sound like I know what I'm talking about.
As an aspiring (albeit, not very good) humor writer, I find myself reading humor columns and thinking to myself, "That's pure gold." Now I don't laugh out loud often when reading things, especially online (and especially when I'm at the office "working.") But today, I couldn't help myself.
Bill Simmons (ESPN's Sports Guy) was writing about the introductions to Monday Night Football and how he wished that type of introduction could be used in everyday life. (For those who don't know, the starters all have the opportunity to say their name and college when the offense or defense is introduced.) Simmons wrote that he wished that could be done instead of some cheesy DJ at weddings. It would go something to the effect of "Bill 'Big Game' Simmons, Usher, College of Holy Cross or "'Dirty' Luke Martin, Groomsman, The Georgia Southern University."
I asked Yes Dear if we weren't married, if she would have considered doing it. She looked at me as if I'd just asked if she minded if I took a call from Angelina Jolie in the other room. Since most of my friends are already married, I guess I have to pin my hopes on Official Brother.
In unrelated news, my key doesn't fit the lock at my work anymore. For the better part of three years, when people have asked me how work was going, I would inevitably say "well, my key still fits the lock, so I guess that means I'm still employed." However, when I left to go home for dinner Wednesday night, I noticed my key wasn't working correctly. When I got back, the door was locked and, sure enough, I wasn't getting in on my own. Fortunatley there were people there to let me in, but my irrational fears of getting fired have been with me ever since. (Maybe I can take the approach of one of George's girlfriends from Seinfeld and simply refuse to accept the firing. If I keep showing up, what are they going to do?)
What I'm playing: EA sports FIFA 2005
What I'm watching: NFL Playoffs
On Deck: The origins of the nickname "Dirty"
posted by Luke at 1:08 AM
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